Will's Sacrifice
by Posessed-by-the-music
Summary: Will Herondale knows that his best friend is dying, so he must decide to give up his love for Tessa for Jem's happiness, or keep Tessa for himself and risk hurting her with his dark secret.
1. Problems of the Heart

Chapter One: Problems of the Heart

Will stood with his back facing the doorway, he was staring at the portrait of Magnus Bane hanging over the fireplace, he wondered how long ago it was painted and thought he hadn't changed one bit since. The mansion he had come to visit Magnus in was owned by Camille Belcourt, The Head of the Vampire clan for New York City and who was also Magnus' ex-on-and-off-lover, but she was currently out of town, so Magnus had taken up temporary residence here.

Magnus locked the door to the parlour and walked towards Will, "So do you want to tell me what your problem is, or do I have to do a truth spell? They are very tiring and I cannot read your thoughts William"

Will clenched and unclenched his fists, he was shaking with anger, and it was visible to Magnus.

"William, are you ok?"

Magnus was wearing a silky kimono, bright purple with lime green dragons on it, and underneath he was still exquisitely dressed in a Hugo Boss suit, black pinstripes, with a white shirt and a hot pink tie; no one could've pulled that look off but Magnus Bane. His hair was shorter than last time, or maybe it looked that way because there was so much glitter and hair gel in his hair. Will tore his eyes away from Magnus' colours and looked up at him and cleared his throat.

"I think Tessa is in love with Jem, or he is in love with her, or they are both in love with each other, I don't know, can you do something about it?"

Magnus sighed and slapped his forehead lightly with the palm of his hand.

"I am not a love doctor or a therapist William, I don't see how this concerns me or what you want me to do about it"

"I don't want Tessa living at the Institute, could she live with you? You could teach her how to be a warlock"

"Is this a favour from the Clave? If it is you know what my condition is"

"No, consider this a personal favour for me"

"Ok, so you are asking me to take Miss Theresa under my colourful Warlock wings so you don't have to deal with this problem yourself? Because you are jealous?"

"That's exactly right" crossing his arms

Magnus folded his arms against his chest, matching Will's pose.

"No"

"Oh please! What do you expect me to say to them? Jem is so…sensitive, and Tessa… Tessa…" Will paused, in deep thought, and then he spoke again, "Actually you're right, I can fix this problem myself, if Tessa wants to be with Jem I should let her, Jem deserves some happiness in his life"

"So wait, you're just giving up a chance at true love for your dying best friend? That's…" Magnus couldn't think of a word for that

"That's what Parabatai do" Will told him, as he unlocked the parlour door and left.

Magnus just let him go, there was no use in stopping him, Will Herondale did whatever he wanted once he set his heart to it.

* * *

><p>Tessa sat on her bed and stared out the window, her hand held onto her little clockwork Angel, she thought she had lost it for good, and now it was safely back with her, of course the chain it once hung on was broken, she would have to find something else to hang it on, some twine maybe… a soft knocking at her bedroom door shook her out of her thoughts.<p>

"Come in" she told the person on the other side. Her room was dark, she hadn't lit a candle to read yet, somehow, she thought, she was too distracted by thoughts of Will's behaviour and by what Jem had told her about the 'right man', to read tonight.

The door opened and in stepped the visitor. Tessa could only see their silhouette in the doorway.

"Who's there? Will?" she asked, and suddenly the room was lit up by witchlight, and she saw that her visitor was Jem.

"Only me" he smiled softly and shut the door behind him.

"Jem? Where's Will?"

"I don't know he isn't back yet"

"Where did he go? I haven't seen him since dinner"

"I'm not sure he didn't tell me, but that's normal behaviour for Will" he told her as he came to sit down beside her on the bed. Tessa sat up and moved closer to him, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"Is everything ok Jem?"

"Yeah, I've been wanting to say something to you, but I can't"

"Why not?" her answer came out in almost a whisper.

"Will"

"Will's behaviour is confusing; he's been very distant from me lately" she told him

"Same" his voice was breathless as he moved his face closer to Tessa's; their mouths were centimetres apart now. Tessa's stomach did a little flip and she sucked in a breath, as much as she loved Will, his behaviour made her mad, it was so self torturing, and Jem soothed her, and if he _was_ dying, she wanted to give him a little bit of love before he left this life. She leaned forward and pressed her lips on his and he immediately reciprocated.


	2. For Love or Honour

Will stormed back into the Institute and straight up the stairs towards the bedrooms. He didn't know who he was going to confront first; Jem or Tessa, but he did know that he was dreading doing it. He walked down the hallway that held both Jem's and Tessa's rooms, they were opposite each other, dangerous, he thought to himself, he didn't like that idea one bit.

A door opened up ahead of him and out stepped Jem into the hallway, he had come from the room on the left, Will knew Jem's room was on the right when he came up the hallway from the entry of the Institute, which meant that Jem had come out of Tessa's room.

Will fought the urge to be harsh towards Jem, inside he wanted to grab him by the shirt and shove him up against the wall, but instead he just cleared his throat and walked up to him. Jem looked up at the sound of Will's approach.

"Jem" Will said, his voice sounding almost breathless, as if he had been running.

"Oh Will, there you are, we were all looking for you"

"Sure you were. How's Tessa?"

"Now you're concerned about Tessa? She worries about you, you know. You should really talk to us"

"I'm fine, were you just in her room?"

"Yes, someone has got to check up on her, we were just talking" Jem crossed his arms, he felt as if Will was confronting him about being in Tessa's room.

"Sure" Will's voice was heavy with sarcasm, a facade Jem knew Will used to cover up the underlying issue, some deep dark secret he was hiding from the world.

Will clenched and unclenched his fists again, he was staring at his scuffed boots, he then looked up at Jem and spoke again.

"Listen Jem, I need to talk to about something"

"Sure, you know you can talk to me about anything, that's what being Parabatai means right? Why don't you come into my room, Tessa's asleep"

"Fine" he answered and followed Jem into the room across from Tessa's.

Jem lit a candle and removed his violin and its case from the bed to the chair at the end of the bed, he then sat down on the bed but Will remained standing.

"Why don't you sit Will" he offered. Will blew out a breath he didn't know he was holding, Jem noticed he was shaking a bit.

"Will? What's wrong?"

"Ok I'm just going to say it, I know about you and Tessa"

Jem was taken aback, he was stunned.

"Um, there's nothing going on, not really" he tried to defend himself but Will held up a hand to stop him.

"Before you speak let me finish, what I'm trying to say is that I'm ok with it, if you love Tessa you should be with her, you deserve her, hell, you deserve her more than I do"

Jem didn't know what to say, he was shocked, why would Will do that, give up a chance at true love and to be happy? Jem wanted that for him, wanted him to be happy, he had hoped that it would maybe take away some of the darkness that lurked inside of Will.

"You're just giving me Tessa? But you love her, she loves you!"

"I do, and she does, but I definitely don't deserve her, you deserve her more"

"But Will I don't need you to give her to me; I didn't want to fall in love because of this…this thing"

"Your condition I know, But Jem, I want you to be happy, I mean no one knows how long you have left" Will put a hand on his shoulder

"Don't feel sorry for me Will, don't do this just for me, you've got to look after yourself too"

"No I don't, I'm too far gone" He said, standing up again.

"What do you mean Will?"

"I mean that I'm not good for Tessa, she needs someone like you" he turned and walked out of the room.

"But Will!" Jem called out, he could've gone after him but why bother when he wasn't going to get anymore of an answer than he had already been given.

Jem pulled his boots off, he was wearing loose beige pants, a loose white shirt and light brown suspenders, he pulled the suspenders down so they hung around his waist and he laid back against his bed. He was confused; Will had just given him Tessa, but why? Why did Will feel that he was 'too far gone' and too dark to have Tessa? What was so wrong with Will that he felt he couldn't be in love?

No, Jem felt that same way about himself, because he was slowly dying from the demon potion he had to take every few days, he didn't want to fall in love with someone and then die on them, he knew all too well what that kind of pain felt like, he couldn't do that to Tessa. Jem then realised what he needed to do, he would let Tessa decide.


	3. The Bad Heart or The Good Soul

Tessa walked out the back door and down the cobblestone path to the barn where the carriage and horses were kept, Charlotte had told her that's where Will might be. When she got closer she could hear the sounds of someone munching, a whinny and some soft human whispers. The barn door was slightly ajar; she pushed it open a bit more and strode inside.

There was Will tending to the horses, and he was shirtless, his shirt was hanging from the waist line of his pants like a rag. Tessa's heart skipped a beat, she tried to turn around and leave but she was so nervous of Will's lack of a shirt that she lost her balance and fell into a pile of Lucerne hay, luckily for her it was a clean pile of Lucerne; for the horses to eat.

Will spun around and laughed when he saw her.

"Making yourself at home I see?"

"You couldn't dress yourself properly again I see?"

"What, this? Don't like what you see?" he stepped a bit closer to her.

"Not all girls get turned on by half naked men, are you going to help me up?"

"No but most do" he held out his hand and Tessa monkey-gripped him and he pulled her up.

"Thank you, and I am not most girls" she told him, brushing her dress off.

"I know that" he stepped closer, now he was so close that Tessa could smell his breath and his body, which smelt like mint, sweat, metal, leather and horses. She shuddered and looked at his bare chest in front of her, it was well chiselled and he had well defined muscles from the hard Shadowhunter training he had to under take.

"Will" she breathed, and fought the urge to place her hands on his naked chest, she couldn't, deep down she felt as if she had betrayed him, cheated on him with Jem, she had kissed Jem and she had liked it.

"Tessa look at me" Will put his finger under her chin and lifted her head up so that she was looking at him, so she looked at him, his deep blue eyes, his dark black hair, the light shadowing of stubble on his chin, he was beautiful, but he was also distant, Tessa pulled away.

"Will I don't understand, first you want me, then you don't talk to me, now you want me again, tell me what you want?"

Will had to think about that, what did he want? _A lot of things_, he thought, but he didn't say it. Instead he said, "You" and he stepped forward again, put his hands on either side of Tessa's face and leaned down to kiss her, but she pushed him back.

"What's wrong?"

"What's wrong? I should ask you that same question" Tessa crossed her arms in front of her. "Tell me why you've been avoiding me"

Will exhaled a breath he didn't know he had been holding.

"Because…I love you Tessa"

"What? But that makes no sense, if you love someone…" Will cut her off

"Hear me out, I love you, but I cannot be with you"

Tessa felt as if she had been stabbed in the gut, or kicked or punched or shot, just like the victims she had been made to change into, except there was no blood on the front of her dress this time. She held her gut and fought back tears.

"Why not?"

"Because I am not good for you, Jem is"

"Jem?" Tessa sucked in a sharp breath in fear, _he knows!_

"Yes, he has a good soul, and I… I have a bad heart"

"Bad? As in you have heart disease, or bad, as in…"

"Dark, rotten, bad" Will replied, he almost spat each word. He turned away from her and went to put his shirt on but didn't do up the buttons.

The tears Tessa had been fighting fell now, they cascaded down her cheeks, and she could taste them in her mouth, wet and salty.

"Will I do not believe you" she half ran after him

"Believe me, I would not do this if it weren't for the greater good, please be with Jem" he turned around to face her and stroked her cheek, wiping away a tear track. They stood in the doorway of one the barn stalls, Will had mucked it out earlier so there was clean fresh hay lining the floor. Tessa couldn't bare it anymore; she grabbed hold of his unbuttoned shirt, pulled him to her and kissed him.

Will began to protest,

"No" he said, but Tessa held him to her,

"Ssh, please, just let me have this one last moment if you're going to give me up" she whispered, and this time Will didn't refuse her, he kissed her back even deeper, crushing her closer to his body by placing his hands on her waist and holding her there.

They moved into the stall and knelt down on their knees in the straw. Will's hands were all over her and their kisses were passionate and fierce. She took off his shirt and he took off her jacket and popped open the buttons on the back of her dress.

* * *

><p>The barn door creaked open and Jem walked inside. He picked up a saddle and went over to Xanthos' stall, who was happily munching Lucerne.<p>

"Hey old man" he told the older Gelding, Xanthos was older than Balios, he placed the saddle on the stall door. He noticed Balios was still standing in the middle of the barn, and grooming equipment was still lying around him on the ground. He knew Balios was Will's favourite horse and he remembered that Will said he was going to be down here.

"Will? Are you here?"

There was a rustle of hay and some hushed voices, Jem turned around to see Tessa coming out of the open stall, her hair was messed up and full of straw, she quickly shrugged on her jacket.

"Oh Tessa hey, sorry if i disturbed you, you weren't taking a nap in the stall were you? I don't think that ones clean yet"

"No, I um…" she began to say but was cut off by Will coming up behind her.

"Oh its clean all right" he was finishing doing up the buttons of his shirt, his hair was also full of straw.

Jem's heart fell into his gut; he glanced from Will to Tessa and back to Will again.

"I didn't expect you to be able to move on Tessa, Will's making it very difficult for you"

"Jem I can explain"

"No it's all right, I understand, you made your choice" Jem turned back around, picked up the saddle and went into the stall to tack up Xanthos.

Tessa turned to look back at Will, who walked straight past her over to Balios.

"Is this how it's going to be now? Is this how you leave me?"

"What more can I say, you just broke Jem's heart"

"_We_ broke Jem's heart, the least you can do is go talk to him"

"Why me?"

"Because I'm not standing in the middle of a Parabatai pair, right now my feelings are like a tug-o-war rope" she crossed her arms

"Fine" he huffed and walked over towards Jem, who was doing up the last of the buckles on the girth. "Look I'm sorry brother"

"No its ok, don't apologise, you love each other, I understand" Jem said calmly, not looking up from what he was doing.

"Yeah and it's because I love her that I have to give this sacrifice, she's all yours" Will turned to walk away but Jem halted him.

"Wait, don't do this just because you feel sorry for me, I told you this" He raised his voice, it was full of anger. Will spun back around and faced him, their faces were close, but the stall door still separated them.

"I'm doing this because I love you both, I'm doing this for the both of you"

"But Will, take care of yourself for once, take care of your own heart"

"My heart is way past being healed" and with that Will stormed out of the barn and into the daylight.


	4. Tessa's Decision

Tessa was frozen. Will was gone and Jem was preparing his horse for a ride. She probably should go after Will but she couldn't do much more, couldn't convince him to think differently, so she turned towards Jem, who looked up at her as he walked his horse out into the centre of the barn.

"Jem i…"

"Save it Tessa, its ok, go back inside"

"Jem, please don't push me away too, Will expects people to push him away but please don't do that to me" she placed a hand on his arm, stroked his grey coat a bit. He looked down at her hand there and then up at her face, into her eyes. He dropped the reins he was holding and took a hold of Tessa's hands. She could feel his thin bony hands beneath his brown leather riding gloves, but he was warm, and all Tessa wanted to do was wrap her arms around him.

"Tessa, whatever you want, I'm ok with it"

"That's the problem; I don't _know_ what I want"

"Well its up to you Tessa, but personally I think you should be with Will, you make him light up like witchlight"

Tessa pulled away from him and stepped back a few paces.

"Don't. it's my heart, its my decision"

"And I must let you decide" his answer was almost a whisper but Tessa heard it. Jem gazed at her longingly, sighed and then got up onto his horse Xanthos. He was about to kick the horse to move forward but Tessa's voice halted him.

"Jem wait" Tessa's voice barely came out; her throat was so constricted because she was trying to hold back tears. She ran towards Jem, he held out his arm and Tessa grabbed on and he hulled her up onto the horse behind him and they took off at a gallop.

* * *

><p>The sun was high in the sky as they rode through the streets of London at a steady walking pace. Tessa had seen London through a carriage window, a bit with Jem on foot, but never on horseback, it was magical.<p>

Her arms were snugly placed on Jem's waist in front of her, she was sitting so close to him, she felt his warmth and decided then that she loved it. She was comfortable with Jem in a way that she wasn't with Will. With Will she was breathless and at times awkward, and other times he made her so infuriatingly mad that she wanted to kill him and kiss him all at the same time.

But Jem seemed more fragile than Will, and she wanted to take care of him, even though he was perfectly capable of taking care of himself. Jem's voice snapped her out of her thoughts.

"You ok back there Tessa?" Jem looked back at Tessa over his right shoulder.

"Yes, just thinking"

"What are you thinking about?"

"About how different you are from Will, and about how each of you make me feel" she was surprised with herself; she had never been so open before with anyone.

"Will is so dramatic; he really didn't have to do what he did"

"And you are so care free, you act like nothing bothers you, but deep inside this must really be hurting you" Tessa felt him tense and then shrug.

"I am not saying its not" he told her as the horses hooves suddenly crossed over a different type of surface than the cobblestone they had been walking on. Tessa looked around them and noticed they had entered Hyde Park. Tessa was breathless at the mere sight of it, and it felt more amazing being on horseback.

Jem tugged the reins and Xanthos slowed to a stop.

"We are here" Jem said as he slid down off Xanthos and held out his hand to Tessa. She smiled a bit and slid down and immediately lost her footing, her ankle gave way and she stumbled forward, right into Jem's arms.

"Whoa, I've got you"

Tessa looked up at him; he was so close to her. Jem lifted her up so she was standing up on her feet again. His arms were around her waist and she automatically put hers around him.

"Thank you" she whispered, and stood up on her tippy toes and kissed him. He didn't pull away. She felt him tense and then relax, as if her kisses soothed him, he kissed her back deeper.

Xanthos snorted with impatience and Tessa pulled back from the kiss.

"I don't think Xanthos likes public displays of affection" she chuckles and pats the gelding's velvet nose.

"That and he wants his nosebag" Jem took the Gelding's reins and tied them to a nearby tree branch and reached for the nosebag full of grain that was tied to the saddlebag, untied it and slipped it over the Xanthos' head, he whinnied and happily began munching away.

"Now that he's happy…" she took Jem's hand and pulled him back towards her.

"Hang on" he took his hand away for a moment, only to reach up and unstrap the blanket that was rolled up at the back of the saddle, Tessa hadn't noticed it before.

"Come with me" he told her. Tessa smiled and then followed close behind him.

They walked all the way towards the lake and Jem stopped and flung out the blanket in front of him so it unravelled and he set it down on the grass.

"After you Miss Gray" he offered, Tessa curtsied and sat down, folding out her skirts all around her.

"Thank you Mr Carstairs" she added playfully

Jem sat down beside her, "Now we can talk"

Tessa watched him, the sun shined off of his silver hair, it was almost metallic, and his eyes were like storm clouds as he gazed back at her.

"I've made my decision" she told him

"And what is that?"

"You will have to wait until we get back to the Institute so I can tell both you and Will together"

"Fine" Jem seemed disappointed, "but was that kiss any indication?"

"I can't tell you; right now can we just sit here and enjoy each other's company?"

"I would like nothing more" and Jem slid off his riding gloves and took Tessa's hand.


	5. Will's Nightmare

Jem moved closer to Tessa and placed his hand in her hair, tucking it behind her ear. Tessa's hair was held up in a bun behind her head with hair pins, Jem tugged them out and her brown hair cascaded down around her shoulders in soft curls. Tessa gasped as Jem kissed her lips, then her jaw, then her neck and back up to her mouth again. She wanted him so badly, but she had wanted Will this badly, and look what he had done to her, but none of that mattered right now, in this reality she was here with Jem. Tessa pulled him down onto the blanket…

Will sat up, it was the middle of the night, and he must have passed out drunk in his bed. He realised as he saw the bottle of gin next to his bed. When he was drunk he often dreamed. Sometimes good ones of him and Tessa, and sometimes bad ones like this, Jem with Tessa, holding her the way he used to. But it was his own fault, wasn't it? He wished for this to happen? Didn't he? Will groaned and got out of bed, if only his dreams didn't feel so real.

He walked over to his door and opened it, only to find Tessa standing on the other side, tears were streaming down her face.

"Tessa? What happened?"

"Come quick, its Jem"

"What's wrong with Jem?"

"Just come" she grabbed his shirt and pulled him down the hallway and into Jem's bedroom.

Will freezed in place when he saw Jem, he was more pale then he had ever been before, and he was coughing into a handkerchief, Will saw red, he realised in horror that it was blood.

"Jem… what happened Tessa?" he yelled at her, he wanted to shake her, but it wouldn't help a thing.

"We went riding in Hyde Park, everything was fine until it started to rain, so we galloped back and Jem started to cough, so I brought him up here, he didn't want to be taken to the infirmary"

"Did you give him his antidote?"

"There's none left" Jem whispered, Will and Tessa barely heard him.

"What was that Jem?" Will asked

"There's none left, it's all gone"

"Well why didn't you get some more you selfish bastard!"

"Will!"

"No he knew he was dying and it's the only thing that keeps him alive just that little bit longer!"

"No one knows what its doing to me" Jem coughed, he could barely speak.

"Ssh Jem, don't speak" Tessa comforted him, she placed a hand on his, Will looked at it as if it were an insect which needed to be squashed, Tessa quickly withdrew her hand.

"I'm going to get you some more" Will turned to leave but Jem's voice kept him there.

"Will, don't leave, please stay, Tessa too"

"But I need to get you the antidote"

"No, don't bother" he coughed again and laid back again, he pulled a face, he was in obvious pain.

"What can I do? I want to do something, anything!"

"You have done enough Tessa" Jem told her, taking her hand in his and stroking it. She was kneeling next to his head and Will was near Jem's feet, sitting on the end of the bed.

"And Will?" Will who was looking down at his own hands, looked at Jem, "Take care of Tessa, be good to her, I know you can be"

"Do not talk like that James Carstairs"

"If you guys want to do something for me, then be together, look after each other, that is what I want more than anything" Jem told them, he was crying now, tears were rolling down his pale cheeks. His hair and eyes were both almost white now.

"James…" Will choked out, he was crying, Tessa had never seen Will Herondale cry before, but who wouldn't cry when your bestfriend/brother/parabatai was about to die?

"Look after each other, I love you both" he whispered, and then he closed his eyes and his life slipped away.

Tessa lifted Jem's lifeless cold hand to her lips and kissed it, she could taste her own tears. She put it down on top of Jem's other hand on his abdomen, and looked up at Will. He was not holding back his tears, he didn't care if they soaked his clothes and the blankets on Jem's bed, Jem, his only brother, his best friend, his parabatai, was dead.

"I will just leave you alone with Jem" Tessa told him as she stood up and turned to leave, she glanced back at Will before leaving, Will met her eyes with a look of utter hurt and anger? Tessa wasn't sure, she quickly opened the door and walked out.

She was about to go to her room, but she heard some footsteps coming towards her, she turned and saw Sophie, who had once told her, without words, that she loved Jem, and she suddenly hated herself so much for being so selfish, Sophie could've told Jem how she felt, she could've shared an intimate moment with him before he died. Then Tessa suddenly realised that someone other than her and Will had to know about Jem's passing.

"Sophie, I need you to tell Charlotte and Henry and Jessamine" Tessa began, in between sobs, she wiped her tears and continued, "That Mr Carstairs, Jem, is dead"

"Jem is dead?" Sophie's hand flew to her mouth and she began to cry, "Oh my goodness, oh my goodness" she leaned back against the wall to support herself; then realised Tessa was still standing there. "I will tell the others" and she ran back the way she had come.

* * *

><p>Will closed Jem's bedroom door behind him and walked down to the library, over to the liquor cabinet, got a full bottle of gin, and walked into the Sanctuary. It was quiet in there, his footsteps echoed in the big room, it was dark and the candles were lit, they reflected off the water in the fountain, the sound of trickling water and the sniffling of his nose were the only sounds in the room.<p>

He knelt down near the Alter of the Angel on a cushion and bowed his head.

"Please forgive me for drinking in your place of worship" he sobbed and took a big gulp of gin, "But I need to ask you to watch over my brother in arms, James Carstairs, for he is with you now" Will took another mouthful of gin.

"Please help me to go on and fulfil his wish"

Suddenly there was a hand on his shoulder, Will turned and saw a bright light, he thought it was The Angel come to him on earth, but he focused his sight and realised it was Tessa, who was holding his witchlight stone.

Tessa knelt down next to Will and took the gin from his hand.

"What, are you…" Will began to protest, but stopped when Tessa took a swig from the bottle.

"Praying too"

"I thought you were a good girl"

"Why? Because you've never seen me drink before? I've had a few drinks with Nate in the past"

"When you were grieving?"

"Yes, after my parents funeral, and after Aunt Harriet's death, that time I was alone" she took another swig, Will took the bottle from her and took a drink too.

"No one should have to grieve alone" she told him, turning her head to look at him, his blue eyes met hers.

"Are you going to fulfil Jem's wish?" She asked him

"Yes, will you?"

"Yes"


	6. Farewell Mr Carstairs

Will never thought he would see this day, he knew it was inevitable, Jem was ill but Will didn't think it would be this soon. He stood at the window and watched the other shadowhunters preparing the funeral arrangements down below. He felt as if half of him had been taken away, after all, Jem was his Parabatai, which meant a brother who always had your back, or a blood brother, a soul mate, whatever you wanted to call it, it didn't matter, Will only felt like half a man.

There was a tap on the door behind him, but Will didn't turn, he knew who it was. Footsteps approached him and he felt a hand on his shoulder, and Tessa was by his side.

"We're ready to go"

"I'll be there in a minute" Will's voice was monotone and it hardly had any life, which was how he felt, _it should be me down there on that funeral pier, not Jem!_ He thought to himself.

Will turned to look at Tessa, she was dressed all in white, this time she had been allowed to attend a funeral, because it was Jem, everyone knew he would have wanted her there. Will gasped.

"What? Will what is it?" Tessa asked, suddenly conscious of herself

"You look beautiful Tess, I wish James were here to see you"

"But he will be, he's watching over us now, like my aunt Harriet and my parents, that's what I believe" she held out her hand to him

"What do you believe?" she asked him.

"I believe Jem is with the Angel now" he replied as he took her hand, and they walked together out of the room and down the stairs to where the others were, waiting to bury Jem.

* * *

><p>Jem was dressed all in white, like they were, with ceremonial red and gold sheets of transparent silk layered over the top of him. His cane was between his hands, which had been strategically placed on his stomach, the green of the jade stood out against the white of Jem's clothes and hair.<p>

His body had been laid on a pier that was layered with straw, on top of which Jem laid. In each corner of the pier, stood a torch, each of which were lit. Tessa guessed that part of the ceremony would include using the torches to set the straw alight which would engulf the body and turn Jem into ash.

During the ceremony, each person took it in turns to speak about Jem, each saying beautiful things about him, she was shocked when it was Jessamine's turn, she couldn't believe her ears.

"Jem was never rude to me, although he never let me get away with being rude to anyone; he often put me in my place. I often thought that I would want to marry someone like Jem one day, he was such a gentleman, and Will ought to learn a thing or two from him…I don't know how he ever put up with Will, it took great strength…" Jessamine paused to swallow and wipe away a tear from her eye, "I will miss you James Carstairs" she finished and gently placed a red rose next to Jem's body.

Tessa glanced around the semi-circle they formed around the funeral pier, Charlotte was weeping, holding onto Henry's arm, who was looking down at his feet, a tear track stained his cheek. Jessamine was still crying, Tessa's wasn't surprised, Jessamine's speech had made her cry. Then last but not least she looked at Will, who was standing on the other side of her, but a little distance away, he was staring upwards, towards the torches, or Jem's body, she thought, but he wasn't crying.

"Will, do you want to say something about Jem, or shall I go?" Tessa asked him. He didn't break his stare from whatever he was looking at, but spoke anyway.

"No I will go" he cleared his throat and stepped forward, towards Jem.

"The day I came to the Institute, I didn't know any of you, I was scared, most of the day I hid in my room behind a closed door, I didn't have any friends, I didn't know any kids my own age, until I met you" he was speaking to Jem, Tessa realised, he continued speaking.

"When I finally gained enough courage to step out of my room, I wandered into the library, where I found Jem, he was reading a novel, it was in chinese. I asked what he was reading and he handed me a book, it was the English version of the book he was reading, Oscar Wilde's _Dorian Gray_, I guess he was teaching himself English. After that Jem always said I was a bit like Dorian, we both were struggling with a dark secret, that was slowly taking a hold of us, he was right"

Everyone was looking at Will now, as if telling him now was not the time to say this, so Will continued.

"Anyway, that was the day I found my love for literature, and found a friend, a brother, who had my back to the end. I will grant your wish my brother" he stepped forward and placed a rose, a long with a small silver object, which he slipped under Jem's fingers. Tessa looked closer and saw what it was, a small horse, sculpted out of metal, with eyes that were jade.

Will noticed that Tessa was watching him,

"He once gave me the horse, he said that it would give me good luck in battle, and strength, see it has a strength rune carved into it" he told her, "I'm just giving him back what is rightfully his, so he can have good luck now"

Tessa wanted to ask him about what he had said before, about his dark secret taking a hold of him, but now was not the time, it was her turn to speak.

She suddenly felt her throat constrict with the warning that tears were about to come, but she cleared her throat and spoke up.

"Jem was the gentlest soul I had ever known, that I will probably ever know, he seemed so frail, that if you touched him, he would shatter into a thousand pieces, but that was only the outside, a kind of glamour you could say, inside he was much stronger, so strong that even Will's antics couldn't break through" she glanced at Will, and saw a small smirk that vanished in the blink of an eye.

"He was willing to give up anything, even a chance at love, just so his loved ones could be happy, I don't know of anyone else who could've done that, you are an inspiration to us all Jem and I will miss you, I will never forget you" Tessa walked forward and placed her rose next to Jem, and placed a kiss on his cold cheek, and she whispered, "I will keep your promise" and stepped back into the semi circle formation.

Then Will and Henry, from opposite sides, stepped forward and took a torch from its holder and lit the straw, setting it alight, it created a smoky circle around Jem's body, and the flames engulfed him.


	7. The Final Goodbye

Tessa couldn't tear her eyes away from the smoke and the flames, Jem's body was burning, turning to ash before her eyes, she felt like yelling stop, but it was too late, Jem was no longer with them. She felt a hand on her shoulder, she turned to see that it was Charlotte.

"Come on Tessa, Will's waiting for you by the carriage".

Tessa took one last look at Jem and followed Charlotte to the waiting carriage, one of the two they had taken to the Silent City, the others were getting into the back carriage, while only Will waited by the front one, he was standing by the horses, patting them. Charlotte nodded to Tessa, telling her to go ahead, and joined the rest of the Shadowhunters. She approached him.

"Will?"

"I was wondering if you would like to accompany me in paying tribute to Jem"

"I thought we just did that here?"

"We did"

Just then one of the Brothers stepped forward out of the smoke and handed Will what looked like a vase, Tessa realised what it was, Jem's ashes were inside. Will nodded to the Silent Brother and put the vase on the front seat of the carriage before offering Tessa his hand.

"I would like to pay tribute to James my way, please come"

"Of course I will" and she let Will help her up into the front of the carriage. He followed and with a quick flick of the reins the carriage lurched forward.

"So where are we going?" she asked Will as they travelled through the city.

"Blackfriars bridge, Jem's fa…"

"Favourite place" Tessa finished for him, Will turned and smiled at her, and put one hand on the ceramic jar between them that housed Jem's remains, Tessa put her hand on top, he didn't pull away, but they rode in silence the rest of the way to Blackfriar's bridge.

Will pulled the carriage right onto the bridge and they got out. Will took Jem's remains in one hand, and Tessa's hand in the other, and they walked to the railing, over looking the river Thames.

It was almost dusk, you might call this time twilight, there would be the signs of the first stars in the sky, if there were no clouds, tonight London felt gloomy, there was a thick layer of grey cloud, it had been that way all day. It was also sprinkling with a fine mist of rain, but it held off enough for them to say the final goodbye to Jem.

Will screwed the lid off the jar and put it on the stone wall beside him, he sat the jar down.

"We know you would want to rest half in the silent city and half in your favourite place in all of London, so that's why we've bought you here, I honour your wishes" Will said as he put his hand inside and took a handful of ashes and let them fly in the breeze, before they settled on the water below.

Tessa took a handful and did they same.

"Goodbye Jem" she cried as she let him go.

When all of Jem's ashes were gone, Will put the lid back on the jar and and took Tessa's hand again, they were both covered in a dark grey lining of ash, Jem was still between them, he always would be.

* * *

><p>Will directed the carriage through the streets, they went past the turn off to the Institute.<p>

"Where are we going now Will? We went past the Institute"

"To a bar"

"Will, please don't drink"

"Why not? Its been a long day, and you said it yourself that you enjoy one every now and then"

"Fine, lets go" she told him, she was only going so she could look after him, it was what Jem had wanted.

They pulled up outside a dilapidated building, the name of the pub was no longer lit up and most of the letters were missing and the sign was hanging half off, Tessa tilted her head to the side to read the sign,

"_The Wishing Well_, what kind of bar is this?"

"A Leprechaun one"

"Leprechaun's are real?" Tessa's eyes widened. She looked at the sign again, it was a glamour, and it peeled away to reveal a bright green sign with a picture of a pot of gold next to it, Irish music was drifting out the open door into the night.

"Of course they are, but be careful, they are sly creatures, they trick almost everyone, they are faeries after all" Will helped Tessa down and held her hand as they entered the pub.

As soon as they walked in Tessa saw a number of short statured men with long beards and tall green top hats,a few were waiters, one was behind the bar, and the rest were playing with the band, she had never been in a more cheerful place. Will pulled her towards the right corner of the room where some tables were, he pulled her into a booth.

"What's the rush, you almost pulled my arm off Will"

"Sorry I didn't want to miss this table" he told her as he signalled for a waiter.

While they were waiting Will put his arm around her shoulder.

"What's wrong Will?"

"Nothing, I'm just hiding from someone" he glanced around and quickly looked back at Tessa

"Who?" she followed his gaze and saw one of the Leprechauns coming towards them

"You're hiding from the bar tender?"

"Yes" he replied, looking back, and then she heard him curse. The short man approached the table

"Aye if it ain't William Herondale, what brings you here?"

"Hello Patrick, I'm just here with my girl to mourn the loss of James, can't you let a man grieve"

"James Carstairs is dead? Oh my, my condolences then. And who is this young thing? Another one of your whores?"

Will shot to his feet and swung out his seraph blade over Tessa's head and held it at Patrick's throat. Tessa's saw dropped in horror.

"How dare you pay tribute to Jem and insult Tessa in the same sentence, Tessa is not a whore, she is not a one night stand or a conquest, she is so much more to me, take it back!"

The Leprechaun put his hands up in protest.

"Ok I'm sorry I'm sorry, I take it back" Will withdrew his blade and put it away in his belt.

"Im glad you've found someone special at last though William"

"Thank you Patrick"

"Now what can I get you?"

"A gin and tonic for me, extra lime, and a red wine for Tessa"

"Certainly" then he bowed and walked off. Tessa looked at Will, who sat back down again.

"What was that all about Will?"

"Just a misunderstanding with his sister, I was not trying to seduce her, Leprechauns are not my type"

"So what is your type? You never told me"

With a brilliant grin he answered her,

"Gorgeous warlock girls with brown hair, brown eyes and a smile that makes me weak" Tessa smiled that smile and kissed him.


	8. The Conundrum

As soon as their feet hit the pavement outside the Institute they were in each others arms again, Tessa didn't want to let Will go.

"Oh its freezing now, let's get inside" she said as Will wrapped his arms around her and kissed her. Their lips had barely parted all night at the Leprechaun pub, in the carriage, and now. Will took her hand and they ran inside to the comfort and warmth of the Institute, where as soon as the doors were open they were in each others arms again. Someone cleared their throat, they both looked up and saw Jessamine standing on the staircase.

"What do you want Jessamine?" Will asked irritably

"To say, get a room" Jessamine said and then walked back up the stairs.

"Certainly" Will replied with a grin as he looked back at Tessa, "shall we?"

Tessa took his hand again and followed him upstairs to his room.

It became almost a routine for Tessa and Will, some nights they alternated from sleeping in Will's room, to sleeping in Tessa's, but every night they spent it together. It had been a week since they had said goodbye to Jem and Tessa had begun to feel guilty for not feeling guilty over being with Will when Jem was dead, probably because she knew that this was what Jem had wanted, so she stayed with Will and grew to love him, despite his arrogance and self hate.

It was about a month later when Tessa thought she should work up the courage and talk to Will about the pachyderm in the room.

"Will?" she asked as she lay beside him one night in her bed.

"Mm?" he said as he tucked hair behind her ear

"You know how I can't have children because I'm only half a warlock?"

"Yes I know that"

"And you _can_ have children?"

"Yes…what are you getting at Tess?"

"Well you should carry on your family name"

"wait" Will sat up, he only wore his black Shadowhunter training pants, "are you giving me permission to sleep with someone else?"

"Only so you can carry on your lineage"

"But I don't want kids and I don't want to sleep with anyone else but you" he pulled her towards him so she was sitting, his touch was almost desperate, he kissed her hard.

"But Will" she pushed him away a bit, "you have to, you don't have any siblings"

"I know, don't you understand Tessa, I don't want to" he jumped away from her and off the bed and started pulling on his shirt and boots.

"Ok we wont talk about it, Will please don't go"

"I don't want to talk about it Theresa, let it go" his tone was angry now

"Ok I'm sorry Will, please come back to bed"

"No" he tied his boots and was out the door before Tessa could reply.


	9. The Darkness

It was mid morning by the time Tessa knew where Will had gone, but she had guessed it, his place of reminiscing; the roof. After Will had left her bed, she couldn't sleep, so she paced about her room for about an hour before leaving it and pacing about the music room for another few hours. Tessa was torn between going to Will and talking to him about what happened last night, and leaving him alone, she knew he would be angry, but deep down Tessa also knew that what was best for him in the long run would be to leave her and raise a family of Shadowhunters, carrying on the Herondale lineage.

In the end, Tessa decided to go and see him anyway, so she climbed the ladder up to the roof from the attic and found Will in his usual corner, looking out over London. He must have sensed her coming because he spoke as if he were speaking to her.

"You might as well push me off the roof"

"What?"

"Go on, push me, if you're going to give away my heart you might as well do it"

"I don't want to push you off the roof Will, you would die"

"It's better than being with someone else" he muttered under his breath

"Will please, don't go suicidal on me"

"You don't understand Tessa" he turned to face her now

"Then enlighten me, what don't I understand?"

Will took a deep breath before speaking again

"I'm not right for anyone, not the person who you want me to be with, or even you"

"Why not?"

"I'm a murderer Tessa"

Tessa tried not to gasp in shock or show her alarm in her voice

"You're a murderer?" she asked, as if Will was being sarcastic about it

"I'm not joking, I really am a murderer, in fact I'm a fugitive"

"Is that why you said you have a black heart that can't be healed?"

"Yes, well no, it was healed, you healed it Tessa, and then you broke it"

"I'm really sorry Will, you don't have to be with anyone else if you don't want to, if you're happy with me then I'm happy with that" she took a few steps towards him

"I can't be with you Tessa" he said quietly, so quiet Tessa almost didn't hear it

"You said that before and I didn't listen remember?"

"No you don't understand Theresa, you just don't get it!" he raised his voice at her, his tone turned angry

"Then tell me!" she yelled back. Their faces were close, Will looked down, he was holding Tessa's hands in his, tightly, so tight they were going white, he quickly let go.

"Tell me what happened Will, tell me who you think you killed" Tessa's voice was calm and reassuring, Will took a deep breath and began his story.

"When I was a boy, ten years old, I had this maid, well she was the family's maid servant, but she was assigned to me, I hated her and she hated me"

They sat down on a stone bench on the rooftop, Tessa listened intently.

"She used to come in my room every morning to bring me breakfast; I used to throw the tray at her head. One day she'd had enough, she knew my routine, so before I could throw the tray at her, she grabbed my wrists and pinned me down and threatened me"

"She threatened you?"

"Yes, she threatened to kill me if I didn't stop my behaviour"

"Then what happened?"

"Not knowing my own strength I pushed her off of me and she flew across the room and her head struck the fireplace and she died"

"It was just an accident Will"

"But I killed her, I killed Cecily"

"Cecily? _That_ was Cecily?"

"It was"

"What did you do after that happened?"

"I fled, I ran to the institute because I knew I couldn't face my parents after that, so I pretended that I had chosen a life as a Shadowhunter, just so I didn't have to face what I had done"

"And you're very good at it" she took his hands in hers and looked into his deep blue eyes

And then out of the blue he asked her a question

"Would you like to learn how to become a warlock?"


	10. Warlock School

"Maybe this was a bad idea, what if he doesn't want to train me?" Tessa asked anxiously as they waited outside the home of Magnus Bane.

"He said he would, he promised me" Will told her

"Doesn't he usually ask for some sort of payment for favours? What are you going to give him?"

"Don't worry I've already paid him"

Tessa didn't get to ask what it was because the door opened and leaning against the door frame, was Magnus Bane

"Well well, if it isn't William Herondale and Miss Theresa Gray, what brings you here on this fine morning?" he winked at Will

"You know why" Will told him, he clearly seemed a bit uncomfortable but Tessa didn't know why

"Of course of course, Warlock training, well don't just stand there, come inside" he stepped aside to let them pass

"Thank you" Tessa curtsied and walked inside, but Will was stopped by Magnus flinging an arm across the doorway.

"I already paid you remember?" Will said in a hushed voice

"That was a down payment, I'd like the full amount now, if you wouldn't mind" his eyes seemed to twinkle at Will and Will suddenly went red and looked immediately at Tessa, who was watching everything.

"Not now in front of Tessa" he said throught clenched teeth

"Go on in and make yourself at home Miss Gray, there's tea on the stove" Magnus said to her, his eyes not leaving Will's face. Tessa hesitantly left and made herself some tea.

Magnus turned his full attention back to Will, who was standing there anxiously on his doorstep

"You're a manipulator you know, you trick everyone"

"And you infuriate everyone; I'm waiting, no payment, no favour"

"Fine" Will grumbled, "But I'm only doing this for Tessa" he grabbed Magnus' shirt and kissed him.

Magnus' hand slid down Will's back and their kisses grew deeper, Will moaned as if he were enjoying it then pulled away.

"Ok that's enough" he stepped back

"I was just getting into it"

"I'm sure you were"

"And you were too"

"I was not, are we done, can I come inside?"

"Thank you for your hospitality Mr Herondale" Magnus said loudly so Tessa could hear as he stepped aside and let Will pass.

Will joined Tessa in the lounge and sat next to her.

"What was all that about, what did you give him?" Tessa asked in a hushed voice

"Don't worry"

Again Tessa didn't get to ask, Magnus came to join them, he placed the tea pot and two more cups on the coffee table and sat down opposite Will and Tessa.

"So, shall we begin?"

"So what do you want me to do, do you want me to change?" asked Tessa

"No, I want you to firstly, recite this spell for me" he pointed to some words on a page of a big heavy book he had placed on the table in front of them, a spell book.

"What is this book?" Tessa asked as she stared at the words on the page

"This is the Gray book; I'm surprised you haven't heard of it, it was written by your ancestor"

"My ancestor? But I thought Warlock's couldn't have children?"

"Half warlocks can't, but full blooded one's can, if they breed with a mundane"

"But why would they do that? Create a half-blood offspring who can't carry on their lineage?"

"We didn't meet to talk about genetics today Miss Gray, can you please recite the spell?"

"Why are you so obsessed with lineage?" Will asked her

"I'm not"

"Enough William, please let her continue"

Will watched Tessa with intrigue as she read from the Gray book, and Magnus watched Will, but occasionally watched Tessa to make sure the spell was working, and it was, her fingers began to glow a bright blue light, brighter than witch light.

"Tessa! You're hands!" Will exclaimed

Tessa looked down at her hands, they were outlined in a brilliant blue glow that pulsated; it dimmed and then went bright again.

"What's happening?" She asked Magnus worried

"Relax, you just recited the spell to unlock the true power of a warlock" Magnus told her with a grin, making his hands glow blue to show her that it was natural for them.

"So I'm a full warlock now?"

"No, you're still a half blood warlock, and you still have a lot of training to undertake"

"Can I ask a question?" Will asked Magnus

"If the question is, 'when will we be able to see each other again?' the answer is tomorrow" Magnus answered, Will went red

"That's not the question, Is Tessa immortal?"

"No, no one is born immortal, not even I, you have to do an Immortality spell to make you immortal"

"Why did you become immortal?" Tessa asked Magnus

"Because it sounded like fun at the time" half joking

"No really, why?" Insisted Tessa

"Because the woman i loved was immortal"

"But I thought that you were… that you were gay?" Tessa was almost embarrassed to ask him this

"I can be anything I like, I've been straight, gay and bisexual over my lifetime"

"And which do you prefer?" Will asked him

"Will!" Tessa shot him a sharp look

"It's alright Miss Gray, I'm gay, and will be happily gay for the rest of my life" he looked at Will as he said this, Will turned away.


	11. Forever Is A Very Long Time

Magnus got up from the lounge to refill the tea pot and to use the bathroom to 'beautify himself', leaving Tessa and Will alone, Will took the time to talk to Tessa.

"What are you thinking right now? You seem to be in deep thought" he asked

"I'm just thinking about immortality, what it would be like"

"And what are you feeling?"

"Will, you sound like a therapist"

"Answer the question"

"I don't know, sad I guess. What about you? Have you ever thought about becoming immortal?"

"To become immortal I would have to become a Silent Brother and I don't think I could do that"

"Why not?"

"Have you seen them? They mutilate themselves, I couldn't do that"

"Yes I cannot imagine you, Brother William, having a mutilated face, I will always think of you as being handsome"

"You think I'm handsome?" Will smirked

Tessa playfully shoved him just as Magnus strolled back into the room

"Did I miss something?" Magnus asked, watching them intently like a cat watching a mouse

"Not at all" Will replied without hesitation, Magnus still made him feel a little bit uncomfortable

"Were you having the immortality talk?" Magnus sat back down opposite them

"You were eavesdropping!"

"One of my many talents" Magnus grinned like a Cheshire cat and shrugged, "so you _were_ having the immortality talk, what did you decide?"

"That I don't want to be a Silent Brother"

"I know William, your face is too beautiful, if you lay one torture instrument or stele on that face I will kill you myself"

"Thanks for the advice" Will tried not to show how uncomfortable he was feeling

"What about you Miss Gray, what did you decide?" Magnus asked as he turned to Tessa

Right in that moment Tessa felt like the world was zeroing in on her, that everyone was focusing on her, like the whole world was waiting on her decision, she suddenly felt very heavy.

"Tessa?" Will asked as he put his hand on hers

"I don't think I could become immortal, not if you're not" she turned to look at Will

"You said it yourself, you don't want me to become a silent brother, Magnus even threatened me" he stole a glance at Magnus who was watching him back with bright green cat eyes. Did he just wink?

"That I did"

"But Will, no one said you had to mutilate yourself to be a Silent Brother"

"The mutilation is part of their faith"

"But you seem to have faith, in other people, and I'm sure you could learn to have faith in yourself" Tessa told him

"Thanks Tess, but I do not trust myself"

"You don't trust yourself with me?"

"Not completely"

"You haven't hurt me Will" she placed her hand on his, "I trust you" she added with a whisper.

"Do you have faith in me?" he asked her

"Yes, I have faith in you" she told him with a kiss that grew a little passionate, Magnus cleared his throat

"No one canoodles in my house but me, are you two always like this?"

"Pretty much" Will said, smiling at Tessa, Magnus sighed

"Forever is a very long time"


	12. Will's Decision

Will approached Magnus while Tessa was in the bathroom. Magnus had begun to clean up the house, which was by zapping the mess into infinity; Will knew it probably went somewhere.

"Magnus?" Will asked him softly, looking around him to see if Tessa had come out again

"What can I do for you William?"

"You're going to make Tessa immortal aren't you?"

"If that's what she wants then yes"

"Then I want you to make me immortal too" this caught Magnus off guard, a tea cup which Magnus had made float in the air, fell and smashed on the floor.

"Now look what you made me do" Magnus sighed and cleaned up the broken cup pieces, with magic of course.

"Magnus please, I love Tessa"

"And so do I" Will gave him a confused look, "Like a sister. Anyway I don't know how it will turn out for you"

"Yeah you do, I'll become a Silent Brother, without the mangled face and hands that is" Will shivered, not because he was cold but because he was disgusted.

"No, William, stupid Nephilim, why are you so ignorant? You don't understand, it is a long and tiring process"

"I don't care, I'll do it, I'll do anything to be with Tessa, because otherwise I have nothing else to live for"

"Ok, fine, if you're so adamant to go on this suicide mission, I'll make you immortal"

"Thank you, let's get started" Will rubbed his hands together

"Not until Miss Gray comes out of the bathroom, what's taking her so long? She's worse than me"

"I don't know, _girls_. Can we please just start? Tessa will protest"

"Very well, go to my bed chambers"

Will froze; Magnus was always hitting on him, always making sexual innuendos towards him.

"Why your bed chambers? Are you going to ask for another payment? I told you I won't go that far" Will put his hands up in protest

"No, just lay down on the bed, I need you in a resting position"

Will and Magnus walked into the master bedroom and Will lied down on the bed. Magnus pointed towards his bookshelf and a large spell book floated towards him. Will admitted, watching him do magic was pretty amazing sometimes. Magnus opened up to the right page.

"Ah here we go, _The spell of Immortality_" Magnus cleared his throat and put his hand on Will's forehead.

Tessa came out of the bathroom to find the sitting room empty, where had they gone, she thought.

"Will? Magnus?"

A bell tinkled somewhere down the hallway and out popped Magnus.

"Ah Miss Gray, I was beginning to think you had drowned in the lavatory"

"No, I'm fine, I was just thinking about being immortal, being with Will forever"

"I know it's quite a menacing prospect isn't it? I mean William is horrendously awful sometimes" Tessa shot him an icy stare.

"Where's Will?" she asked him

"He's resting"

"Resting? Why?"

"he's just gone through a lot of pain"

"Pain? Magnus what did you do to him?"

"He chose this, don't shoot the messenger" Magnus put his hands up in protest

"You are not the messenger you are the head honcho" Tessa's hands were glowing blue with fury as she ran down the hallway into the master bedroom.

Will was lying on the centre of the bed, his arms by his side, but Tessa could see ligature marks where his wrists and ankles were bound with rope, which were still dangling from the four bed posts. Tessa thought Will looked paler than he normally did, his black hair made him look pale, but this was different, it was as if all the life and blood had been drained out of him. Tessa sat on the bed beside him. Magnus appeared in the doorway just as Tessa reached out and touched Will's hand.

"Tessa, no!"

At Tessa's touch, Will opened his eyes, they were white, and his pupils were gone.


	13. City of the Dead

"Will? Will can you hear me?" Tessa asked softly as Will began to stir. She looked back at Magnus just as a hand grabbed her wrist, she looked back at Will and he was staring at her with white hollow eyes.

Will breathed; he appeared to be trying to speak. Tessa leaned in closer to his face, putting her cheek and ear near his lips.

"Tess" he whispered, it was barely audible, infact it was just a breath of air against Tessa's face, and it wasn't even warm, it was cool.

"Will it's me, I'm right here" she told him, looking back at Magnus again, who was standing right behind her with his arms crossed against his chest, leaning against the door frame.

"What happened to his eyes?" she asked Magnus

"I'm not quite sure" replied Magnus.

"What do you mean you're not sure? I thought you said you had done this spell before"

"I have, but everyone is different, let me see" Magnus took a step forward, but Tessa blocked his path, putting her hands up in front of her, blue sparks came out of her fingertips.

"No, don't come any closer" she told him

"Miss Gray…"

"I demand you to tell me exactly what you have done to Will!" Tessa was yelling, Magnus sighed.

"He is a Silent Brother without any training"

Tessa gasped and spun back around to face Will, who was now sitting up, his legs were in front of him and he was staring straight ahead.

"You did it Magnus, did you hear that Will, you're immortal!"

"Yes I heard, but something went wrong" Will spoke for the first time

"What do you mean?" said Tessa and Magnus in unison

"I can't see"

"What do you mean you can't see?"

"I mean I can't see, anything, nothing, I am blind"

"Blind?" Tessa shrieked, she spun around to face Magnus again, Magnus held up his hands in front of him in protest.

"Just a small side affect of the spell"

"Small?" Will spoke, "That's an understatement, its earth shattering! I cannot see Magnus!"

"Magnus please do something!" Tessa begged.

"I cant I'm sorry, you're going to have to learn to embrace this, soon you will learn to see telepathically"

"Great. You do know that my blue eyes were my best feature?"

"Yes I know that, it was what drew you to me" Magnus said, half sarcastic.

Tessa ignored Magnus and sat down next to Will.

"We'll get through this, soon I'll be immortal and we can be together forever" she told him in a warm soft voice. Will turned his face towards Tessa, to where he thought her voice was coming from, which was accurate.

"No, I will not let you go through what I just went through"

"But it won't be like what you went through, right Magnus?" Tessa looked from Will to Magnus, who was checking out his nails, he looked up when Tessa spoke.

"Not exactly"

"What do you mean Magnus?"

"You know the answer to that my dear Theresa"

Tessa sighed

"Because I am half warlock"

"Which means you won't turn into a silent brother, you will turn into a full warlock" Will stated

"Not _full_ warlock" Magnus corrected, "still half warlock, just immortal"

"Then it will be ok right?" Tessa asked Will with pleading eyes

"Yeah it's ok, go become immortal"

Magnus led Tessa to the living room and told her to lay on the couch, since Will had the bed, he still needed to rest. While Magnus performed the Immortality spell on Tessa, Will lied back on the bed and willed himself to sleep, he was so exhausted that sleep came easy, and so did the dreams…

_At first all he could see was nothing, it was foggy and dark, then it became lighter, the mist had a brown and horrible feeling to it, and it smelled awful, like damp ground and rotting corpses, was he in a cemetery?_

_As it became lighter he began to hear whispers, were they saying his name?_

_Will tried to listen harder, yes, they were saying his name, but who were 'they'?_

"_Will…" The voice called, it sounded like it was coming through the fog towards him, he spun around and that's when he caught his first sight of 'them', except this wasn't a 'them', it was one, it was Jem._

"_James… where am I? You're…" Will was unable to form proper sentences, he was so shocked at the sight of his best friend standing right there in front of him, and he looked bright and normal and healthy, not like he was when he was dying._

"_You're in the City of the Dead, and yes I am dead, and you can see me"_

"_But why can I see you? I can't see anything anymore"_

"_Yes I can sense that about you, you've had the Spell of Immortality worked on you, you will soon become a Silent Brother"_

"_Yes I know that, it still doesn't explain why I can see you, are you a spirit?"_

"_Yes, and you will only be able to see those whom you had a deep connection with, and you can see us because of the darkness inside of you"_

"_The Darkness? You make it sound like a thing"_

"_Its more like black demon ichor inside of your heart, it's slowly burning away your humanity, if you don't get rid of it, it will kill you"_

"_So how do I get rid of it?" Will asked Jem, who had begun to turn and walk away_

"_It's too late I'm sorry Will"_

"_Jem, what do you mean? Jem?" Will called, but it was no use, he was talking to the mist, Jem was gone._

And then Will woke up.


	14. Voices in the Mist

Will sat bolt upright in bed and almost struck his head against Magnus' head, who was sitting very close to him.

"You were dreaming" Magnus stated

"Yes I know, what are you doing here? You could give me a bit of warning next time" Will said irritated, rubbing his forehead.

"I have come to see if you're alright because Tessa is done, her spell has been completed"

"Can I see… I mean, can you take me to her?"

"Fine, but you have to be quick, a carriage from the Silent City is on its way"

"The Silent City? Why are we going to the Silent City?"

"not _we_, _you_. You're going alone, you have to go into training"

"But Tessa…"

"Tessa will be fine, she can come see you whenever she wants" Magnus told him, helping him out of the bed. Will put his arm through Magnus', and Magnus lead him down the hall into the sitting room where Tessa was.

_Tessa could hear voices, voices all around her but she couldn't see anyone, the mist was too thick._

_Suddenly they were closer and she thought she recognised a familiar voice, or should she say voices, yes there were two familiar voices nearby, both british, but one had a hint of asian influence, Jem! It was Jem!_

_Tessa wanted to scream his name but she couldn't speak, her voice wouldn't come out, there was something stopping it, she wanted to run to him but she couldn't run, her legs felt weighed down like they were in concrete, plus she didn't exactly know where he was, she couldn't see anything._

_She felt so helpless without all her senses…wait, not all her senses were lost, and she felt a connection through her mind to Will._

"_Will?" she said telepathically, because she realised, that was how she had to communicate here in this place, which she didn't exactly know where _here_ was._

"_Tessa?" said the voice in her head._

"_Will? Is that you?"_

"_Yeah, Tessa are you alright?"_

"_I'm fine, where are you? What is this place?"_

"_Jem told me this was the City of the Dead, where all the souls go after they pass from their bodies on earth"_

"_But why are we here? We aren't dead"_

"_I know, but we can communicate with the dead it seems"_

"_Wait, you said Jem told you? Jem's here?"_

"_Yeah he was just here, he's gone now"_

"_I thought I heard him, where did he go?"_

"_I don't know"_

"_And how come I can hear you..wait! I can hear you Will! Telepathically, your power works"_

"_I wouldn't call it my power, I'd call it an unwanted gift"_

"_Unwanted? But Will this is amazing, I wonder if it will work when we're awake"_

"_We will soon find out"_

Then Tessa felt like she was being plucked from the dreamscape or City of the Dead and dropped onto Magnus' couch. She woke up sputtering. She sat up, her head felt heavy and she felt drowsy, like she had been drugged, maybe she had been, and the drugs had given her that crazy dream.

She heard some noise down the hall and turned to see Will and Magnus entering the room, she smiled. Will was being helped along by Magnus because Will couldn't see.

"Will?"

_Tess_

The voice had come from inside her head, she looked at him in amazement.

"Will you did it, you can speak telepathically"

_I know I thought I would try it out, pretty cool huh?_

"Yeah, incredibly" Said Magnus

"Magnus you can hear Will also?"

_Great, nothing is secret, I thought I could have a private conversation with Tessa_

"Sorry to break it to you buddy" Magnus told him, Will glared his way, the effect was more menacing with blank white eyes.

"Is there anything else you to want to say to Tessa before you go?"

"Wait, before he goes? Where is he going?"

"To the Silent City to begin his training"

Tessa looked at Will, he gazed towards her, he could feel where she was in the room without physically seeing her. Tessa never thought she'd see the day when she would have to say goodbye to Will, she thought they would be inseparable now that they were both immortal, together forever she thought, well she thought wrong.

_It's not forever, and you can come and visit any time you want_

Tessa smiled, stood up and walked over to Will and wrapped her arms around him, she felt him tense and she stepped back.

_Actually don't come and visit me for a while, the training could be brutal_

"I don't care Will; you're pushing me away again because you think you're damaged, and I think I can fix you"

_No you can't, no one can_

"Who told you that?"

The doorbell rang and Tessa was never able to find out who because Will left.


	15. City of Dreams

The Silent Brothers lead Will through the Bone City.

"So where are we going exactly?" Will asked the two brothers leading him, Brother Isaiah and Brother George, Will thought George was a pretty ordinary name and to meet a Silent Brother with that name was even more peculiar. Brother Isaiah looked like all the other Brothers, but Brother George had only one of his eyes left, it freaked Will out every time George looked his way.

_Speak through your mind William Herondale_, said Brother George. Will never had gotten used to the brothers speaking in his head.

"Ok sorry I'm just getting used to this"

_Magnus Bane the Warlock said that you picked it up straight away after your transformation._

_**Not straight away**_. Will surprised even himself by speaking telepathically

_Then tell us how you did it. This is new and exciting for us, not many people can speak telepathically just out of their transformation_, Stated Brother Isaiah.

_**I guess it happened when I woke up after having a dream,**_ Will told them.

_You had a dream?_ Brother George asked

_**Yes two dreams actually**_

_Tell us about them_

_**Well the first time I entered the City of the Dead and spoke to Jem, I mean, James Carstairs**_

Two hollow faces turned towards him, Will froze

_**What did I say?**_

_No one can enter the City of the Dead without dying first_

_**Then maybe I died during the transformation**_

_Or a small part of you has died_

_**Well I was always thought that half of me had died along with James**_

_No this is different, I can sense it; your soul is gone_

"My _soul_?" Will squeaked, in his normal voice this time, it echoed through the blackness before them. The brothers turned to face him once more.

"Ok mental voice, sorry"

_**My soul is missing? How can my soul be missing?**_

_It was taken from you when you were a very young boy, before you came to the institute._

_**Who took it from me and can I get it back?**_

_That is enough questions for now William Herondale, we are here_

Before Will could ask where 'here' was, the darkness receded and light filled the space. They were standing in a long corridor that very much reminded Will of the institute and along it were seven doors, three on each side and one at the end, each doorway lead to a bedroom with a comfortable four poster bed inside, again, exactly like the institute.

_**What are these rooms for?**_

_This is where you will be staying during your training, get rested, someone will be coming to speak to you soon._

_**Who?**_

_A City of Dreams expert_

And with that Brother George left Will standing all alone in the corridor of doors.

* * *

><p>Tessa lay on her bed in the institute, trying to read just a paragraph of the book that was resting against her stomach, but she couldn't concentrate, all she could think about was Will. What was he doing right now? Was he alright? Then Tessa had an idea, she would speak to him through her dreams like they had earlier. She closed her eyes and wished and hoped Will was asleep also.<p>

Will made himself comfortable in the last room on the left, but not the one at the end, his curiosity almost got the better of him and he almost peeked inside but he didn't, he just went to bed. He was so tired that he fell asleep in his boots and began to dream.

_ Tessa walked through a grassy meadow, the grass was so long it almost came up to her waist in some areas and the air was lovely and warm like a summer's day. This dream was much more pleasant than the last one she had where she spoke to Will, speaking of, where was he? She sat down by a trickling stream and decided to wait for Will. There wasn't much to do in the Silent City so he would be here soon, she thought._

_It suddenly grew cold and Tessa noticed that the sun had gone behind some clouds. Then a long shadow. Too long and close to be a cloud, hovered over her, she turned around and there stood Will._

_He was dressed all in black, not gear, but his everyday clothes, but they were all black, his shirt, his trousers, even his boots were black._

"_Will you're here, I knew you'd come" Tessa stood up in front of him_

"_I can't stay long, someone's coming to talk to me"_

"_Who?"_

"_A dreams expert in the Silent City to talk to me about these dreams, I'm going to find out what they mean"_

"_That's really good, you look really good" Tessa reached out to put her hands on his chest, he stepped back from her._

"_Will…"_

"_Tess" he said softly and stepped forward and placed his palm on the side of her face_

"_Will what's the matter? Is everything going ok over there?"_

_He wanted to very much to tell her that his soul was missing and that he may never get it back, he knew he should share this with her, but it just wasn't in his nature, he pulled his hand back._

"_Its fine, everything's fine, I just miss you"_

"_I miss you too Will" she stepped toward him again was just about to pull him toward her to kiss him but he was pulled from the dream and jolted back into the land of the waking._

"What on…By the Angel why did you do that?" Will spoke out loud and then swore when he saw who had woken him out of his dream, it was Jem.


	16. City of the Stolen Souls

"James? What the… am I dead?"

"You asked me that the first time, and the answer is still no"

"Then how are you possibly sitting here in front of me? I must be going insane if I'm seeing ghosts when I'm awake now too"

"You're not going insane Will"

"Then are you alive? Are you back?" Will started to get excited; he almost jumped off the bed.

"No I'm not alive, I'm still quite dead"

"Then what are you doing here?"

"I'm the dreams expert"

Will's head was spinning and he felt like he was going to pass out, he laid back on the bed.

"No way" Will covered his face with his hands

"We can take this slow if you want; it's a lot to take in"

"If you're the dreams expert, and I last spoke to you in a dream, then I must be dreaming"

"You're not dreaming, but you were when I arrived, you were talking to Tessa weren't you?"

Will looked at Jem through his fingers

"How did you…"

"I can see your dreams"

Will sat up

"Can I ask a question?"

"Sure"

"Could you see people's dreams when you were alive? Because you never mentioned this before"

"No I couldn't, I can only do this now since I've died"

"This day is getting weirder and weirder, first the speaking telepathically thing, then George, now you; I don't know how much more I can take"

"George?"

"Brother George, he has one eye"

"There's a brother named George with one eye?"

"Yeah, you haven't seen him?"

"Not yet"

Will thought about what the Brothers had told him.

"Jem, Brother George and Isaiah said that my soul was missing"

"Yes I know"

"You knew? And you failed to mention this because?"

"I was going to, but I had to leave, I can only stay in the earth plane or the City of the Dead for a short period of time"

"Do you know how I can get my soul back?"

"You can't"

"Why not?"

"Because it's in the City of Lost Souls"

"How many of these cities are there? We didn't learn about them at the Institute"

"Don't worry I'm still learning all this myself. The City of Lost souls is where Souls are taken when they are stolen from someone who is still living, the City of the Dead is where souls go when you die"

"Who teaches you all this, your ghost tutor? From the _Ghost 101 Handbook_?"

"Very funny Will, not quite. It is kind of like the Institute though, when your soul reaches the gates of the City of the Dead, you're taken in and put into classes"

"Let me guess, your classes are things like _Haunting 101_ and _How to enter people's dreams"_

"Exactly" Jem told him, Will was dumbfounded.

"So you said my soul was stolen, stolen by who?"

"Probably by an angel or a demon, most probably an angel though"

"An Angel? But I thought they were the good guys, we're half angel!"

"This one was probably a fallen angel, one who rebelled against heaven and was kicked out"

"Great, I want to track down this bastard and kick some angel butt"

"Not a wise choice Will"

"Why not? If I get my soul back I won't be damned and I can live forever with Tessa"

"Its easier said than done"

"You know how to do it don't you? Tell me James"

"Its not easy to track down a certain Angel, in fact its almost impossible to track down an angel at all, we don't even know if they're around anymore"

"They have to be, don't you just say a prayer and one comes down?"

"I don't know"

"Well its worth a try" Will closed his eyes

"Will what are you doing?"

"Summoning an Angel"


	17. Summoning Angels

Will closed his eyes and joined his palms in front of him.

"Will I don't think this is a good idea" Jem warned him.

"Ssh I'm praying"

"My Holy Lord in heaven, I would like to ask for help in finding the angel who took my soul, even just the smallest clue would help, thank you. Amen" Will finished his prayer and opened his eyes to find Jem staring at him.

"What? I'm surprised you're ghost tutor hasn't dragged you back to ghost school yet"

'If you don't want me here you could just say so, but I'm here to help you" Jem told him, sitting on the bed in front of Will.

"I knew you'd haunt me"

"It's probably for your own good William"

"So what do we do now? Wait?"

"I guess so. You know, this might not work, you do know that don't you?"

"It's worth a try" Will checked his pocket watch impatiently

"Will it's been five minutes, give it time"

"But they're angels, they should be instantaneous"

"Nothing is instant Will. Look I have to go"

"Back to the City of the Dead University?"

"Yes"

"But we have to wait for the Angel"

"I'll come back later"

"Wait" but it was too late, Jem was gone, back to the City of the Dead, and Will was left to wait for the angel alone.

* * *

><p>Jem landed back in the City of the Dead, he hated the blistering heat and the fog. He walked quickly back to the dorm building, up the steps and to the right towards the male dormitory, when he was suddenly stopped in the hallway right outside his room, he swallowed, it was his professor, who also happened to be the Grim Reaper, also known as the Angel of Death.<p>

"Where have you been Mr Carstairs, you missed all your morning classes"

"I know Sir and I'm sorry, it won't happen again"

"You were in the Land of the Living again weren't you?"

Jem knew he was busted, he swallowed a second time

"Yes sir, but I was helping a friend, well he's more than a friend"

"He's your Parabatai, I know, what you Nephilim like to call _brothers in arms_"

"Yes sir"

"I hope you weren't helping him to find his soul, he doesn't deserve one, I've been wanting to get my hands on him for a long time now" the Professor rubbed his hands together greedily.

"Everyone deserves a soul sir, without it…" He was cut off by the Professor slamming his hand against the stone wall next to them, it made Jem jump.

"Do not talk back to me, and do not go back to the Land of the Living, you hear me?" The Professor threatened, and then he left.

"Yes sir" Jem answered quietly, his voice almost didn't come out, he was scared out of his wits. But he did learn something, the angels and the demons weren't the only ones after Will's soul.

* * *

><p>Will had drifted off to sleep again, it was so boring in the Bone City. The brothers came every once in a while to bring him food and to test his mental telepathy, it was quite tiring, so sleep came easy for Will, and he wasn't surprised when he began to dream.<p>

_Everything was blurry at first and then became a little clearer once Will's eyes adjusted, it was like seeing under water. He was in a bedroom, it looked exactly like the Institute. And when Will's eyes adjusted a little more he could see a figure in front of him sitting on the bed, he knew straight away who it was, Tessa._

"_Will, its you, I've missed you"_

"_I've missed you too Tess" Will sat down on the bed and took her hands in his. "I've got to talk to you"_

"_You know you can tell me anything" she told him with a warm smile, oh how he missed that smile, those eyes, those lips…he was drifting past the moment._

"_Tess, its my soul"_

"_What about your soul Will?"_

"_It's gone"_

"_Gone? How can it be gone, and you still alive"_

"_I have no idea, that's what I'm trying to work out, I'm waiting on an Angel, and those bastards take their time let me tell you"_

"_You summoned an Angel?" Tessa gasped_

"_Yes what's wrong with that?"_

"_Its not safe, others will be watching"_

"_Others? You mean demons?"_

"_Yes, and reapers, spirits, a whole number of bad entities, you're not safe"_

"_Why are they watching?"_

"_To find out who has your soul"_

"_How do you know this Tess?"_

"_I'm a warlock; I hear things no one else can"_

"_By the angel Tessa, have you been practising black magic?"_

"_Only a little, to find out a way to help you"_

"_So you knew about this before me?"_

"_Yes I'm sorry" Tessa's voice began to warp and sound distorted, and she faded in and out of focus._

"_Tessa what's happening?" _but she didn't get to answer, Will was pulled out of the dream by a hand, but not just any hand, the hand of an angel.


	18. The Location of the Soul

Will was shocked, stunned, dumbfounded, all of the above. He was sitting face to face with an angel, who he realised, had pulled him out of his dream.

"You could have given me a bit more warning, I was having a good dream" Will was shocked when the angel replied inside his head.

_You summoned me, William Herondale, this is about your missing soul_

It wasn't a question

"My _stolen_ soul, someone stole my soul and I want to track down the angel who did"

_Only an Angel of Death can take one's soul unwillingly_

"Right, now how do I track down this Angel of Death?"

_You can't track or summon the Angel of Death, he can only come to you when you are close to death_, the angel told Will.

Will thought for a moment and then spoke again, something that Jem had said resurfaced in his brain.

"Did this Angel of Death take my soul to the City of the Dead?"

The Angel shifted his weight, it seemed to Will that he didn't want to answer this question, but he did.

_Yes, your soul is in the City of the Dead_

"Great, ok, I need to get there"

_You do understand that you need to die first to enter the City of the Dead?_

"I know, but once I get my soul back, I can return right? I'll be alive and immortal"

The Angel went silent

"Right?"

_There is no guarantee that your soul will be able to re-enter your body_

"Why not?"

_Because of how long it has been missing from your body and because of your…state"_

"My state? What's that supposed to mean?"

_You are now a brother of the Silent City, but the good news is that you have a connection to the City of the Dead_

"Do you mean Jem?"

_Yes, and because during the immortality transformation you died, so your body is open to the City of the Dead, more so when you are dreaming, it is very dangerous_

"Are you saying I shouldn't dream? How do you stop someone from dreaming? You can't!" Will was getting agitated, he didn't want to stop dreaming; it was his only connection to Tessa and Jem.

_I'm not saying you shouldn't dream, I'm just telling you to be careful about who you let in_

"Not even Tessa and Jem?"

_Do not let James Carstairs in_

"Why? He's my brother"

_It's dangerous, do not let him back in do you hear me?_

"But why? Why can't I let Jem back into my head?"

The Angel stood up and unfurled his magnificent silvery-white wings, Will gasped, he had never seen anything so amazing, he resisted the urge to pinch himself, but he knew he wasn't dreaming. The Angel looked straight into Will's eyes.

_Because he is very close to the Angel of Death, he is James' Professor_

Before Will could speak, the angel flapped his gigantic feathery wings and was gone, and all Will felt was a puff of air on his face.


	19. The Angel of Death

Will had to warn Jem about his professor, he had to fall asleep and dream, despite the Angel's warnings, nothing had ever happened before when he dreamt. Will laid back on his bed and closed his eyes.

_Jem walked past The Soul Room. He knew this room was out of bounds for students and newbies like him, but he had to go in there, he had to find Will's soul. He twisted the door knob infront of him, but it wouldn't turn, it was locked. Jem looked at the lock, it wasn't exactly a lock and it didn't contain a key hole, it was more like a touch sensor pad, it had a hand shape on it. It was like someone had put their hand in cement to make a mould and then stuck it on the door. It flared with blue power when Jem waved his hand over it. It reminded Jem of witch light, maybe it was just like witch light, Jem thought. He placed his hand over it and the door hummed and vibrated and then opened inward. It worked, Jem was in._

_Inside there were millions upon millions of rows of shelving that held glass jars. Jem stepped closer to a row and took a jar in his hands. It suddenly glowed white with life, a soul, Jem thought, but not Will's. He read the label on the jar, Jeremy Wattletree. He put this jar back and looked at the next few, he was in the W row, he needed H. He walked to the other side of the room and said the alphabet in his head, A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H…he turned left down H row._

_Harrison, Hairynose, Heron, Herondale… Jem stopped short and picked up the jar labelled Herondale, it said William Herondale, and the date the soul was taken, twelve years ago. Jem tucked the jar containing Will's soul into a black cotton sack and quickly walked out of there. Now he had to find out how to get the soul back to Will._

_Jem reached the door and opened it, he stepped out, and walked straight into his Professor's assistant Karin._

"_So sorry, my apologies, I didn't see you there Miss Karin" Jem stuttered. Karin was an odd woman, short and pale, she always wore dull clothes, today she wore a grey blouse with a black woollen vest over the top and a black woollen skirt over black tights and black heels, that didn't add to her height very much at all. She had black hair and skin as white as snow, but it was dull and almost translucent, like she could fade away at any moment. She also wore black framed reading glasses which always hung down on her nose because she was always looking up over them with the whites of her eyes while still hanging her head down. She did this now to Jem as she analysed him._

"_You are not supposed to be in there" she said, with a soft nasally voice._

"_I apologise, I um, I just got lost, I'm going back to my dorm now" he told her as he quickly walked away, he didn't look back as she answered._

"_Do not let me catch you here again, I will tell the Professor" She said with a slight evil smirk, which Jem didn't see._

_Jem snuck a glance over his shoulder, Karin was nowhere to be seen. He shivered, she always freaked him out._

Will sat up straight, Jem had found his soul! Will could almost not contain his excitement, he wanted to run to Tessa to tell her the good news, but his heart sunk as he realised that he couldn't, he was stuck like a prisoner inside the Silent City. He slumped back against the bed head, almost smacking his head.

"Ouch!" he said, muttering a curse, rubbing the back of his head, and putting a pillow up behind him so it wouldn't happen again. He thought about his options; one, he could send for Magnus and Tessa to come to him so he could tell them the good news, or he could wait for Jem to bring him his soul. He weighed the two options, when suddenly a third option popped into his conscience; he could die and enter the City of the Dead, find Jem, and get his soul back himself. Will grinned, yes, he liked the third option very much.


	20. Soulless

Jem finally made it back to his room, he was out of breath, but he was safe, and no one had been suspicious about what he was carrying in the black bag. He locked the door behind him and leaned against it to catch his breath for moment, how could he take the soul to Will? Only an Angel of Death could take souls from a body, and only an angel could return them. Jem then realised that he had to find an angel to help him return Will's soul.

* * *

><p>Will slipped outside his door, the coast was clear, he moved forward like a ninja. He was dressed in black like a ninja as well, minus the black ski mask. It really sucked being blind, he couldn't see a thing, it would make locating what he needed extremely hard, but he had to do this. He made his way through the Silent City to the Apothecary, where the brothers grew and manufactured herbs and drugs for their medicinal use and for all the Nephilim and Downworlders who called upon them. He entered silently and looked around, no one was around, that he could sense anyway.<p>

Will's Shadowhunter training at the Institute taught him that the herb that can put you into a coma and make you appear dead, releasing your soul, would smell like chocolate, Will smirked, death by chocolate, perhaps that was where the saying came from. He didn't know how it would work for him since he didn't have a soul.

He felt his way around the Apothecary and smelled every plant he came across, he was going to make himself sick or worse, but he didn't care, since he was going to die anyway. he sneezed when he took in a whiff of jasmine, he always hated jasmine, he moved along quickly. At last he could smell a hint of something that smelt like chocolate as he entered the back room, this must be where they keep the more deadlier stuff, he thought.

_You thought right_, a voice in his head said, Will froze, someone was in here with him.

"Who's there?"

_It is I, Brother Alfred, I am in charge of the Apothecary, what is it you need young William Herondale?_

"Oh, I was after a herb that smells like chocolate, though I am most certain that it is not actually chocolate"

_Ah, you must be after the Rosa mortus, the Rose of Death, it smells like chocolate_, the Brother told him.

_Although I am not sure what you might need with the rose, since it is the deadliest and most restricted rose I have_

"Restricted? as in "out of bounds"?"

_Exactly, so I'm sorry, can I help you with anything else? Some Dream Herb perhaps?_

"Dream Herb?"

_Yes, the Calea zacatechichi or Dream Herb, is used to increase the reaction times and frequency and recollection of dreams_

"That is interesting, but I'm pretty sure I don't need any of that since I can recall my dreams quite vividly"

_Looks like the Dreams expert did his job well then_

"Yes, he did" Will left the apothecary unsatisfied and disappointed. How was he going to die now and get to the City of the Dead to get his soul back? Maybe he would try sneaking into the apothecary later when they brothers were asleep, or he would call for Magnus and Tessa, he really did want to see Tessa again.

Will made his way back to his room and closed his eyes immediately once his head touched the pillow.

* * *

><p>Tessa sat upright in bed in a cold sweat, she couldn't believe what she had seen, had Will sent those images to her? She jumped out of bed, pulled on a dressing gown and ran down the hallway to Magnus' room. She had been staying at his house since Will was taken to the Silent City, she shook Magnus awake.<p>

"Who dares awaken me during my beauty sleep?" Magnus mumbled, half asleep. He pulled the sleep mask up from over his eyes and looked for the perpetrator, his eyes found Tessa.

"I'm sorry Magnus, but we have to go now, to the Silent City"

"Whatever for? And why at this hour?"

"It's Will; he's trying to kill himself"


	21. The Final Day Part 1

"Why in the hell is he trying to kill himself? Is he mad?"

"Apparently he thinks he is"

Tessa and Magnus promptly made their way to the Silent City. Tessa had no intention of letting Will kill himself, she wasn't going to lose him, not after losing Jem.

* * *

><p>Will had made his second attempt at getting the Rose of Death, and this time he succeeded. He had gone to the apothecary very early the day after his first attempt and discovered that the coast was clear, so he grabbed the rose, trying not to inhale until he actually got it back to his room. He had grabbed a mortar and pestal on his way out, so now sitting in his room; he ground a few of the rose petals down to a fine powder. He was feeling a little drowsy by this time so he worked quickly. When he was done grinding the rose petals, he got a glass of water and put the powder in the water and stirred.<p>

* * *

><p>Jem made his way to a place no spirit in the City of the Dead was allowed to go; the edge of the world, the gateway to the City of the Angels; or what humans knew as Heaven. He wasn't allowed to enter, if he did he would no longer exist, he would literally turn to ash because he no longer had a soul. So he stood on the precipice and waited. He had to find an Angel to transport Will's soul back to the earth plane because it was the only way that Will could get his soul back. The veil between the worlds shimmered like an Aurora, swirling and changing colours from green to pink to blue.<p>

Finally the veil lifted like a curtain and Jem began to notice a face on the other side, the form stepped forward and Jem gasped, there standing before him was an angel.

"You summoned me here, James Carstairs?" the Angel asked, he sounded annoyed.

"Yes, I need to ask a favour of you" Jem straightened up and tried to stop himself from staring at the Angel.

"I don't regularly do favours for spirits, but because you are a Nephilim spirit I will make an exception"

"Thank you. I need you to take this soul to its owner, Will Herondale"

"That is against my contract and what I do"

"You work for the Angel of Death?"

"Yes and I will be banished for this and I will most certainly fall"

"He doesn't have to know about this, it will be our little secret, I mean it's not like he has an angel radar"

"No but he will know when I leave and re-enter the City of the Angels"

"But Angels leave all the time don't they and come down to earth?"

"Yes" the angel paused and then spoke again, "Ok I will do this, but I ask for something in return"

"Certainly, whatever you ask for, it will be done"

"I need you to kill Karin"

"My professor's assistant? can I ask why?"

"All I can tell you is that we have history and she wronged me so now I want revenge, and I am not an avenging or fallen angel so I can't do it"

"Ok, I will do it, I will kill her"

"And I will return this soul to William Herondale" the angel said, and took the jar containing Will's soul from Jem, flapped his giant wings once and disappeared.


	22. The Final Day Part 2

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: I just want to say thank you to all my readers who have followed this story, it is my longest one yet! But sadly everything has to come to a end someday, and the day has come for this story. This is the last installment of Will's Sacrifice, hope you enjoy! Thank you again for all your lovely reviews and messages it is greatly appreciated.**

* * *

><p>Magnus and Tessa ran to the entrance of the Silent City, Magnus said the entry spell and they were granted access. Making their way down the dark steps, illuminated a little by Magnus's magical hand light, Tessa was nervous and very anxious to get to Will in time.<p>

"What if we don't make it in time Magnus? What if he's already done it"

"He won't die without saying goodbye to you first" Magnus told her

"How do you know? You've always said he's had a selfish attitude"

"That is true, but there's no denying that he loves you"

"Wow Magnus you have a romantic side" she told him, grinning

"Let's just get there ok"

Will swallowed the potion and lay back on his bed. He began to feel light headed and then he passed out.

_The world around him grew more foggy by the minute and the air grew thicker, Will found it hard to breathe. he noticed someone walking towards him through the mist, he didn't recognize them until they were practically on top of him; Jem._

"_James, a bit of warning next time, alright?"_

"_Will, by the angel, what are you doing here?"_

"_Came to find you and get my soul back"_

"_You shouldn't have come, I was sending an angel to you, he has your soul, please tell me you didn't just kill yourself?"_

"_Um...what if I did?"_

"_Will! You shouldn't have done that! I just pray someone finds you, and fast, so that they can revive you"_

"_I need to get my soul first"_

"_Like I said, an angel is on his way to earth plain right this very moment to give you back your soul"_

"_Ok, help me go back and I'll go back"_

"_It's too late"_

"_What? Why?"_

"_Because you have no soul, now you are trapped here"_

* * *

><p>Tessa turned all the corners into all the hallways in the Silent city faster than anyone should, and ended up slipping and sliding on the floor. Magnus was close behind her and everytime he reached out to try and steady her she brushed him off.<p>

"Tessa steady"

"I'm fine, I have to get to Will fast"

They reached the hallway where all the dorms were and they searched each one looking for a dark haired young man, in the last room they found him, he appeared to be sleeping. Tessa rushed up to his bedside and shook him, he didn't utter a moan or move a muscle.

"Will! Will please wake up!" she yelled through her tears, which were now streaming down her face, "Will!"

It was no use, Magnus thought, and just when he was about to tell Tessa to give up shaking Will, an Angel appeared before them. He pushed past them.

"I must return his soul, stand back" the angel told them.

"His soul?"Tessa sniffed, "You have his soul?"

"Yes, James Carstairs asked me to bring it to Mr Herondale here"

"Jem asked you?"

"Let the angel work Tessa" Magnus told her, putting a reassuring hand on her shoulder, holding her back from Will a little.

The angel stepped up beside Will, opened the jar, reached in and took hold of the glowing soul and pushed it inside of Will through his abdomen.

* * *

><p><em>Will began to feel numb, he thought it must be a side affect of being a ghost and dying, but then he began to feel nauseous, like someone had their hand inside of him.<em>

"_What's going on James?" he asked, doubling over so that he could hold his stomach._

"_Someone must have found your body and must be trying to revive you"_

"_But I feel like they have their hand inside me, ohh!" he moaned and groaned and bent over more._

"_The angel might be trying to put your soul back, which is how they do it, they reach inside you"_

"_I feel like it's an invasion of my privacy"_

"_I'm afraid it's not going to work"_

"_Why?"_

"_It's too late"_

* * *

><p>"I'm afraid it's not working, his soul won't stay inside him" the angel told them.<p>

"What do you mean it won't stay, it's his soul!"

"He has already passed into the City of the Dead without his soul, so his soul cannot be returned to him, and he cannot leave the City of the Dead"

"You mean he's… dead?" Tessa choked, she felt numb and dead herself, first Jem and now Will, she couldn't fathom it.

"I'm very sorry" the angel told her and quickly left Tessa and Magnus alone with Will's body.

Tessa was motionless, she couldn't move, couldn't breathe, couldn't function, Will was gone, he had left her, he hadn't even said goodbye! Tessa let her tears fall freely, not bothering to wipe her eyes or nose, she just stood and stared at Will.

Magnus wanted to help her, he wanted her to say goodbye to Will but he also wanted to take her away from this horrible tragic scene before them. He reached for her but Tessa stepped forward and reached for Will's hand, holding it to her chest, over her heart, and she kissed his cold fingers.

His face looked so peaceful, like he was sleeping, his eyes were already closed so she didn't need to close them. She couldn't believe he had done this, left her like this, without saying goodbye one last time, without telling her! Sure he had warned her in a dream, but she wasn't sure whether it was intentional, still, she couldn't help but feel some anger towards him for that. Now she had lost the two most precious things to her, Jem and Will, and before that, her entire family, now she was alone, alone for eternity.

She felt an arm slide around her, she looked to her left to see that it was Magnus beside her, then she realised she wouldn't be alone for eternity after all.


End file.
